Pitch a book into the darkness

Thoughts on my first week in Artist Career Training

Hi everyone, 

I finished up my last post by briefly mentioning that I was accepted into Artist Career Training (ACT) offered through the City of Austin. It’s a six week program in which we learn how to get in gear to be business owners.  We are taught marketing and taxes and business proposals.  Ultimately, we are working up to pitch something the final week.  There is a monetary prize for the top three proposals.  

During the first class, last week, I was just so stoked to to be there.  I can honestly say that I either wouldn’t have been accepted a year ago, or had I been, I would have stood up and said “Hi, ummm, I’m Sara…I uhhh, well, I don’t really know what I am doing…uhhh….”  Instead I stood up and said, “Hi, I’m Sara!” Followed by other words that I forget but I know I didn’t say anything disparaging and I was proud of that.  

Listening to the other people list off their accomplishments could have been soul crushing, but I didn’t let it be.  I just really understood that we are all there because we are all trying to better ourselves.  It is not a competition (except that it is! Haha.)   (Oops!) 

Classes are on Wednesday evening, which means tonight is the second class.  I have pulled a classic Sara mood switch, swinging the pendulum into the darkness.  I will declare that it is probably hormonal, but it is also my defense mechanism. So I will acknowledge that and move forth.

Part of the application process was to propose what we were going to pitch.  

“AM I SUPPOSED TO PITCH WHAT I AM GOING TO PITCH!?”

I simply wrote, “I’ve always wanted to make a book. I’ll use the money to help with the cost.” (Then I assumed that that answer was terrible and the reason I wouldn’t get accepted.)

In the class, we are broken into groups of four students and one mentor.  My mentor is Sara Hickman, a name I recognized from local public radio when I first moved here in the aughts.  She’s a musician, an artist and genuinely enthusiastic person. 

 (Don’t think that I’m not like, “OMG! It’s so perfect that my mentor is also Sara H.! I can project myself onto her!”) 

What she gathered from my vague book pitch was that I should focus on EMPATHY.  

EMPATHY

EMPATHY

EMPATHY

A word that makes me want to start singing, “I See a Darkness” by Bonnie “Prince” Billy, Johnny Cash’s version. 

This would be a book of paintings/drawings and words.    

Now I want to sing, ”Everybody Hurts” by REM. 

People, why can I not accept that my calling feels steeped in darkness?   I don’t feel like I am supposed to be here to tell you to look on the bright side.  

Toxic positivity makes me foam at the mouth.  I don’t think that all of life is suffering, as my 19 year old self would have gleefully suggested in her best monotone, but I think it’s a great disservice to overlook the fact that it is a part of life.  

Here’s the other thing……….. did you know that I am funny!?

hahahahahahahhaa

How do I mix the two!?

I don’t want to make a ho hum woe is me book, but I want it to be engaging and acknowledge that you too know the darkness.  Or at least whoever picks up the book knows the darkness.

One day maybe I’ll tell you about how I used to always get signs that I need “BALANCE.” It was like twenty-five years ago. I still use it as guidance because I know I struggle with it.  

Balanced Empathy: Get the fuck away from me, give me a hug

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Please, let me know what of my pre-pitch made any sense to you.  What do you think old Sara Sally Sally Sara should dive into?  

General sentiments?

Stories of yesteryear?

Stories of balancing empathies?

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Also, I will be in the East Austin Studio Tour this November 16 &17th.  I’ve been overthinking it for months! I will be selling my work with confidence! Right!? Right!

I hope you can stop by!

****************************************************************

Thanks for reading. (I made myself bust this out instead of hemming and hawing, so I hope it made sense!)